Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Joke: The Mat Salleh that misunderstood

One day, (maybe one of the Visit Malaysia 2007 days) one Mat Salleh arrived in KLIA airport and after he checked out from the Customs, he felt that he wanted to go to the toilet. When he reached the toilet, there was a lady (pretty good actually) sitting in front of it.

As he was about to enter the toilet, the lady stopped him and said fourty cents in Cantonese "Sei Kok!". The Mat Salleh just wonder why in Malaysia, they have to "see the cock" (actually fourty cent in Cantonese) before entering the toilet. So he replied "No!" but the lady insisted.

Since he's got no choice, he took out his cock and showed it to her. The lady said "ooh..no, no,no..! DUIT! DUIT!!" (money in Malay) but the Mat Salleh misunderstood again because he thought she said "DO IT!, DO IT!". So, he asked "NOW..?, HERE..?". The lady then replied "YES..,YES..!" because she doesn't really understand English.

The Mat Salleh thought she agreed to have sex with him, so he strip up the lady and made love to her, but the lady was screaming and said "aa...SAKIT!, SAKIT!!" (pain in Malay) and again he thought is "SUCK IT..!, SUCK IT..", so he said "OK, I will suck it for you". He then took her breast and sucked it hard. The lady again screamed "Ohh..TUHAN!" (Oh, My God! in Malay). The Mat Salleh misunderstood again. "Huh?? TOO HARD??, ok sweet heart, I'll be gentle." the Mat Salleh replied.

Suddenly the Security Officer walked by, and the lady was asking for help, "TOLONG!, TOLONGGG!! ENCIKK!. (Help..! Help.. Encik in Malay). But on the other hand, the Mat Salleh replied "Ohh, not too long and it's just 6 inches or so"

/me crapped at 12:36 AM GMT+8

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Proton scrap metal

I wanted to sell my car but the offered price is simply ridiculous. Proton is just a piece of crap and it's almost worthless. I wonder why our national car maker is such a total failure and still a failure after 20 years in the business. Even the Koreans are doing better and at least they've penetrated into the US market.

On the other hand, I can't get the car that I want and it sucks. I haven't got myself a property as well. Nothing is going on the right direction. Life is pathetic.

/me crapped at 3:16 PM GMT+8

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Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Irritated

Lately I'm moody and easily irritated. Even small little things might get me pissed. I know it's not good but doesn't matter, sometimes we just can't help it. Do you know what life is for? It's an opportunity for us to do good so that we get more merits and quit from the cycle of birth and death. It takes many lifetimes and should be our ultimate aim to be borned in the "Pure Land". I'm devoted to Buddhism and that would obviously be my guidance in life. Even I'm pissed and down now, I will stay strong (as I always do).

I received a forwarded email showing a policemen on a patrol car talking on the phone without a hands free. Well, this is Malaysia isn't it? :)

/me crapped at 11:37 AM GMT+8

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Monday, April 09, 2007

Over the weekends

I finally caught a movie on Saturday night. We watched "The Reaping" and it was pretty good but a little scary (for the girls). My RM11 was well spent on this movie - no regrets. On Sunday, I went for "Qing Ming" and for those who doesn't understand what it is, "Qing Ming" is a day to remember and honour our ancestors. This day is also known as "Tomb Sweeping Day" and originated from the Tang Dynasty. The Chinese culture is rich and has been there for thousands of years. I'm certainly proud to be a Chinese :)

What failed me during the weekends? Well, I bought myself some lotteries but didn't strike. I swapped my absorbers and now I have to do balancing. I also lost the chance to get the car which I've wanted. It looks like nothing much is going towards my way. Sometimes life is just so screwed up, ain't it? Perhaps it's made to be this way, I don't know. Anyway, it's a boring and hot Monday. Have a good one folks - don't be like me :p

/me crapped at 12:34 PM GMT+8

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Monday, April 02, 2007

Don't think about it

Sometimes you tend to make stupid mistakes. If only you're sane at that point of time, you won't be losing out. Since it has passed, you can only choose not to think about it to make you feel better. It was really stupid and if only I was sane!

I'm still obsessed with my online game lately. It's boring for most people because it's strategy and turn based, not even graphical but I find it interesting. That's the only hobby I have apart from sleeping. On the other hand, I'm still hoping hard that I'll be filthy rich someday. When would it ever come?

/me crapped at 6:39 PM GMT+8

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